SWAT SWAT SWAT

Two posts in one day! Here we go! I must have my thinking cap on!

Awaken women are lonely creatures. Awaken, not in a literal way, but in a spiritual way. It's hard to be conscious of the self and of the way the world is and still try to have a mundane life. 




It's hard to speak with other women because they are usually pre occupied with men or their job or all the material things they want. Men are just about as hard to connect with. They are usually more easy going and I think that's why I have more make friends than female. But the problem with men is that there is always the sexual tension. It could be from one side or both but men and women are biologically suppose to w attracted to each other so if you have a male friend, there will most likely be one of you who have thought or are thinking of the other sexually. And then the games start. But to even make make friends is difficult, especially in my 20's. Men don't usually talk to me unless its to find out if I'm single and if I want to have sex with them. They may call it "dinner" or "drinks" or "coffee" but I'm no fool, they just want to bone. At this point I just avoid eye contact with men in general. 

And still get approached...






I'm worried I won't be able to make any more friends. I don't even know what situations to put myself in to meet them either. I try to do things that I like but the thing about women also is that they travel in packs. And it's hard I talk to someone when her 3 body guards are wondering why you're trying to steal their leader. 




I played basket ball at the gym today. I went to work out but once I got there, found out I wasn't really in the mood. So I did my abs and push ups and all that shizam and saw two little boys playing basket ball in the gym below me. So I went to ask for a ball but I was walking in as they were leaving. So I played by myself for about 20 minutes and a random guy came in to challenge me to a game of 21. I won 3 out of 6. They were all one or two points off, exept for the game I beat him 21-3. BOOYA. But anyways my point is that we were having fun and it was fine until he went and asked me if I came normally on mondays and what time and right before he could go anywhere else with the questions, I cut him off to say I had to go. But I could feel it coming. The "well give me your number and we'll play again sometime or go for a coffee" question. You always know when it's coming and there's never a nice way to turn someone down. You might as well kick them in the crotch cause they look at you like a bitch if you say anything but yes.




It's like a compliment I guess to be asked out, but without sounding like I think I'm hot shit, it's really effin annoying to not be able to get through a day without being asked for coffee or drinks or if I have a boyfriend and even after saying yes I have a boyfriend, I still get asked for my number incase things don't work out. They're literally offering to be a post break up booty call. But guys don't care, it's cool for them and slutty for a woman to do so. 

Lucky us! 






So you can either deal with materialistic boy-troubled women, or horn dog men. Make your pick. I might be generalizing allot here. I do have some good girl friends that have other things to talk about other than boys and shopping. And I am in a good relationship with a guy that is also quite awake. It just took me a long time and I would really like l have more friends and a more fulfilling social life, but I can only try. Ill just keep swatting at the flys and hope for some nice people to come by my way.